Welcome!  To the very first issue of Words of Wistrom. I'm kicking it off with one of my favorite stories about my father - Art Wistrom. 

“BULLCRAP”

My dad was a branch manager of a Big Bank (statewide was big in the 1960’s).  He always told me stories about his work.  One of the things that he just loved to talk about was “calling bull-crap” on corporate policies and procedures.  Dad told me that the main office was always sending him tasks that were useless. 

I think it started when he got a corporate notice that he had to count the electric outlets on the walls of the bank.       Dad being Swedish and being pushed a bit too far – Dad wrote “BULLCRAP” on the form and sent it back.  He didn’t hear about counting outlets again. 

Since it worked for that problem – he continued.  I wish I could remember all the things that he wrote “BULLCRAP” on – but he had a long list.  Anything that he considered useless got his handwriting on it and shipped back to the main office. 
“You need to replace the brochures at the front door every week.”  BULLCRAP
“You have to have all employees at the bank and ready for work at least 20 minutes before the bank opens.”  BULLCRAP
“Send us a list of your current level of office supplies.”  BULLCRAP

One Christmas….  I was in high school and wanted my dad to have the very best Christmas Present EVER!  SO…  I had a “ink stamp” custom made that said “BULLCRAP” with a pad of red ink.  DAD LOVED IT!!! He took it to the bank and said that he would hit the main office requests with either ONE, TWO or THREE “BULLCRAP”s. 

Dad apparently become quite known for this at the main office.  One day – Dad’s superior – a Vice President of the bank called my dad and said:
“Art – would you please stop stamping “BULLCRAP” on everything we send you?”
and my dad’s answer?
“Sure – as soon as you stop sending me BULLCRAP requests.”

EPILOGUE – I did something my dad didn’t get to do – go to college.  Both me and my two older brothers received B.S. degrees in Finance from UCONN’s  School of Business.  My second job out of college was with Aetna Life and Casualty in Hartford.  That was at the same time that my dad retired after 44 years with Hartford National Bank.  When he retired – he gave me a beautifully wrapped box.  Inside:  The “BULLCRAP” stamp and a fresh pad of ink.